Something’s gotta change, they’ll never get in…er, they’re all the ****ing same..

In Current affairs, Politics on May 6, 2010 at 8:49 pm

Never let it be said that we don’t keep our ear to the ground here at fullandfrankexchange. This afternoon we were in a builders’ merchant in Sarf London (slight pressure from Mrs fullandfrankexchange to get that shower fixed) and we overheard the following conversation.

“Oi Vince, have you voted and who did you vote for?”

Amid the woodscrews, our ears prick up, completely oblivious to the fact that we’re looking for PLUMBING accessories (moron). This could be gold dust – the internal poll the other parties haven’t got.

Vince, for it is he: “I’m voting later tonight. I don’t know who I’m gonna vote for yet. I’m going to make up my mind when I get there.”

Ahhh, a serious undecided I detect.

Vince continues: “My old man is voting Lib Dem. You know I think I might vote LibDem as well.”

Man behind counter: “I think everyone is voting for them aren’t they? Problem is, they’ll never get in.”

We are now in paints, gloss enamels to be exact and we edge closer to the debate. (No No! I hear a cry from North London, PLUMBING you idiot!!!!  When am I getting my shower back?????)

Third man from office joins in: “Yeah, they won’t get in, but something’s gotta change hasn’t it. We can’t go on like this.”

Second man: “So who get’s your vote Vince?”

Vince: “Anyone who turns up at the door with a biscuit.”

Brilliant – all they needed to secure a vote down here was a packet of bloody digestives. We edge past hand tools. (Dulcet tones in my head hear: “You’ll get a hammer in the feckin’ skull if you don’t move your tijuana brass to the plumbing section sharpish sunshine.”)

Man in office continues: “The thing is, at the end of the day, they’re all the f***ing same. They’ll say anything to get your vote. They’ll cut taxes, they’ll do this and that, but you just end up with the same old crap.”

Vince: “Yeah you’re right. Sometime’s I wonder what’s the point.”

As we move into the pleasant May sunshine, we ponder what this could mean. The polls are about to shut. Has Vince had the vote-securing offer of a biscuit? Will he follow his dad? Did he even bother after a day at work? What will men one and two do? This is what has made this campaign a refreshing change.

Plus, Mrs fullandfrankexchange is going to be really inpressed with this carpentry set I bought…..


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